What I Know For Sure: Five Things Every Woman Needs To Have by The Time She Reaches Her Forties

By this stage in your life, you have probably spent a great deal of energy living up tosomeone else’s idea of you. Your parents, spouses, children, and society’s views and standards all impact how we see ourselves and or how we measure our successes or accomplishments and the lack thereof. I recently celebrated my 42nd birthday, and like most people I always contemplate my position in life as well as my future around my birthday. I am a real number weirdo, meaning I always look up numbers and see what they mean or correspond to. I remember when I turned forty and I looked it up, as I always do, and I was surprised to see all of the biblical references to new beginnings. I found one article that correlated a woman turning forty, to the Israelites making it to the promise land. This was so eye opening to me because I had spent my entire thirties in a mild state of paralysis and depression. Which to me felt like wondering in the wilderness. I had allowed people and events around me to drown out my inner voice.

I was everybody’s something, and my own nothing, but then came my forties. There was something invigorating about believing that turning forty was the beginnings of my new life. I began to pray for God’s presence and direction like never before. It actually took me sometime to remember what it was that I enjoyed. I tasked myself to come up with 10 things that I enjoyed that did not involve serving anyone else. I realized that everything I liked was because of my husband, kids, or father. It took almost an hour but I did it. From that point I began to seek my own happiness first. Not in a selfish way, but in a self-love way. I still have to remind myself that I am too important not to be a priority. Putting myself first is a learned behavior but I’m learning. But what I know for sure is, that I’m worth it!

Here are 5 things every woman needs to have by the time she’s in her forties.

God– A relationship with your creator. I don’t mean just going to church. I mean a constant conversation, prayer, or meditation between you and God. When you are in a relationship, the most powerful tool is communication. Developing your connection with God is very important.

Right look– This is that look you can pull together in an hour, to land your dream job or captivate your dream mate. Know what silhouettes look good on you. Have a “quick face” so even if you are just going to get coffee, you can look pulled together.

Affirmation – By definition the word means emotional support and encouragement. Need I say more?

Cause – A principal, idea or belief that you are willing to work towards insuring its success. I am tempted to say what drives you, because I also believe your “cause” will inspire you into action.

Expertise – That one thing that you do, when you are doing you so well. Even if it’s just a certain dish or a way you pack luggage. You should be able to identify your strengths, and be able to turn it into a profit if necessary.

These words are an acronym for G.R.A.C.E. Which reminds me to give myself grace. Existing by the grace of God, with grace & style, living in his grace and mercy.

Be blessed.