Category: mrsphatandnaptural

Weightloss Journey : 7 Totally Doable Weightloss Tips That Actually Work!

New Year, new me? Nope! Same me, but always pushing for greatness! I know with each January many of us make resolutions or short-term goals and fitness may just be one of them. Guess what? I lost 5 pounds already! Yay me! Of course, it isn’t my ultimate goal, but it is an accomplishment! With baby number three I gained 40 pounds and the weight was so easy to gain yet hard to lose. Here we go, let’s get it!

Eat, Eat, Eat- Often we think we need to diet to lose weight and by dieting we tend to eat less. But instead, we should be thinking quite the opposite. Eating frequent small meals and snacks will keep you on track. Most importantly you should not miss breakfast. I know you’re thinking, duh! But for someone like me, breakfast is not my favorite meal, and I must remind myself to eat it. But breakfast is the most important meal, and should be your heaviest meal.

No Excuses– We all have the same 24 hours each day. Of course, how we spend those hours are all different, but we have to prioritize our time. No matter how busy any of us are, we can always find 20 minutes. I know you are probably thinking finding 20 minutes is not that easy. I know, especially as a mom, but we owe that to ourselves to carve out that time. You can even divide your time, maybe 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the evening.

Strength Train– Cardio is amazing for weight loss, but strength training is like the older sister who knows better. Strength training is hard on the body and exhausting, and literally tears your muscles apart. BUT it will change your body the most, turning the fat into muscle. Remember it is not about how many pounds the weight that you are using is, but simply the repetition that has the most impact. So, start out light, take it slow but serious, and learn the correct form. I currently own 5lb free hand weights and a 10lb kettlebell and they are getting the job done.

Think Ahead- Like most things in life, you are more successful when you plan ahead. This is important for your fitness journey since we usually make not so good healthy choices at the last minute. Maybe you’re like me and not really into meal prepping for the week, so make more of that healthy dinner and enjoy some for lunch the next day! Also pick a time for working out and stick to it. If we sit around waiting for the moment we “feel like it”, we won’t get it done!

Mirror Mirror, On The Wall– Look at yourself in the mirror everyday and study your entire body. If you study your body, you will begin to see subtle changes that does not reflect on the scale. I lose inches easier than I do pounds, so seeing it in the mirror makes me feel good. But each day I look at my entire body and look at what has changed and what I want to change. Remember we must love ourselves through our whole journey or we will never be happy with ourselves.

Research- Reading is fundamental right? As you continue this journey find what works for you, because what works for you may not work for me. Learn how to exercise different parts of your body. Eat right for your blood type or lifestyle. Keep up with your favorite blogger, author, influencer. Sometimes the best motivation is someone else’s journey.

I'm a strong woman I don't sit around Feeling sorry for myself nor let people mistreat me. I don't respond to people who dedicate to me or try to bring me down.If I fall I will rise up even stronger because iam survivor and not a victim. Iam in control of my life and there is nothing I can't achieve.we all need this Attitude😘❤️ Goodmorning Queensandkings Love fitness tights @lotusleggings @lotusleggings @lotusleggings 👉🏾👉🏾👉🏾SEARCH 👉🏾LOVE FITNESS 👈🏾💕💕Use code CONagawa to get 👉🏾50%OFF,Yes 50 OFF💕💕 Am wearing 4x 📷 @tosinphotography #lotusleggings #lovefitness #workingout #blackandehite #lotuslegs #yogapants #tights #workoutgear #plussizeworkout #exercises #

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Step Away- If this journey was easy, I wouldn’t fall off the train so often, lol. But we must make the conscious decision to step away from the things that are not good for us. Making the decision to step away will make it easier to make the best choices. Surround yourself with people who understand and respect your journey. Step away from the numbers on the scale and focus on the journey itself.


The most important thing is to remember to love yourself above all. This journey is not about hating who you are and becoming someone new, but instead loving yourself now! Loving yourself enough to do what is better for your body. Thank you for following my ups and downs with this journey and let’s continue to gain together!

The Fit Phatty

Ja’nay of Mrsphatandnaptural

The Ultimate Guide To Self-care: 25 Acts Of Self-care That Cost You Nothing!

The Oxford Living Dictionary defines self care as such: The practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health.

In other words the deliberate act of taking responsibility for your own good health and happiness. A while ago I decided that to make a conscious effort to make time for myself. I use to have one way of coping with making myself feel better, shopping! Don’t judge me 😁.

Although I still love shopping I started to realize buying things robs me of the deeper more fulfilling happiness that comes from true soul work. Not to mention shopping can get out of hand and cause an entire set of challenges in itself…but that’s a topic for another blog post. I will say self-care does not have to cost you a thing!

Here are 25 of acts of self-care that will not cost you a thing!

1. Get some sleep- this is the most under estimated act of self-care. It is literally recharging your battery.

2. Veg out- eat an extra serving of vegetables, or if you’re really bout it go plant based one or two days a week.

3. Let it go- release the guilt. Let go of that mistake. Take the lesson as a blessing and throw away the guilt. You can’t get the time back, the money is spent and you are here to live another day.

4. Drink plenty of water- We all know this, but I’m going to say it anyway. Drink your water. It’s nature’s liquid gold. It flushes all the toxins out.

5. Spend some time alone- even if it’s just 10 minutes in the car before or after work. Just sit and breath. Or do whatever it is that makes you happy.

6. Find a short path and take a long walk- slow down take it easy. Don’t rush, give yourself permission to take it slow.

7. Write it out- it could be a journal or it could just be a piece of paper. You can write your goals, your ideas or what ever is on your mind. You don’t need to do anything with it or show anyone just release what’s on your mind.

8. Laugh out loud- God is so amazing! He designed us so wonderfully that just laughing releases endorphins, the body’s natural feel good chemicals. It boosts your immunity and decreases stress hormones. YouTube funny videos or call that friend that you know is going to keep you rolling on the floor!

9. Work it out- head over to YouTube and pull up one of the gazillions of work out videos and get busy.

10. Get your Yogi on- do some yoga. You don’t have to be a pro. Here are some of my favorite yoga poses ( here).

11. Dance and sing get up and do your thing- put on the music and get moving. Listening to music will change the atmosphere.

12. Do some decluttering- this has a twofold affect. The act of accomplishing the decluttering will feel good and every time you see the area you will feel good all over again.

13. Feed your spirit – attend church or what ever your spiritual practice is. Perform that in a group setting. Plug yourself into the collective.

14. Take a long shower- I think this is a conditioning response from my childhood. There was nothing in life that couldn’t be fixed with a bath and warm pjs.

15. Take a long walk- get out and get some fresh air. Put on your headphones or not and just take a walk.

16. Smile all day- just try it. Smile at every person you encounter. Not only will it make your day, but it may change their life.

17. Listen to a podcast – there are podcasts about everything. Find one that you like and cue it up.

18. Smell the roses- burn a candle or a defuser of your favorite scent. Aromatherapy is said to eliminate headaches, boost immunity, and reduce anxiety and depression among other things.

19. Read- read a book, binge on your favorite blog (hint 😜), or magazine. Knowledge is power.

20. Lose the limits- we all have self imposed restrictions that keep us comfortable. Every now and then get out of your comfort zone.

21. Plan a trip- Not saying that you ever have to take it, but plan it. See what events are taking place, check the hotel prices, flight fares, even the sites to see. So just in case you do decide to go wheels up, you already have a budget.

22. Map your vision- set a series of goals and start taking steps towards reaching them. Make a list of 3-5 long term goals and maybe 1 or 2 steps that you can take immediately that gets you closer to those goals.

23. Take a walk down memory lane- look at old photos, reach out to a family member or friend and reminisce about good times.

24. Get dressed- I know you put clothes on everyday, but I mean get dressed up. I tend to save my favorite perfume or certain clothes for special occasions, but sometimes you just have to show up and show out.

25. Affirm yourself- write down or copy & paste positive affirmations and post them somewhere, not for decorations but actually read them. Sometimes I’ll put them in my phone as a pop up. Imagine you are having a tough day and that 11:30 pop up sounds, you pick your phone up and it reads ” Nothing Can Stop You” ! All the way up! Or “Slay Your Day”! And you know you got this!


One of my intentions for starting this platform was to spread love. Gods love and Self love to be exact. As a wife, mother, daughter, and employee, sometimes “me” is the last to get the care and attention that I give everything and everyone else. But that doesn’t serve me or them when I’m running on empty. So I had to learn new ways of caring for myself through lasting acts of self care.

Are you a member of the put me last on the list club? Or do you practice self care? What are some acts of self care  you employ ? Drop a line in the comments.

Nine Steps For Taking Your Vision From Board To Reality

Its the beginning of the New Year and I’m sure all of our timelines are filled with all the mantras and resolutions of the forth coming newness!  Nowadays, everyone and their mama does vision boards. Or planners or some kind of goal forecasting. Some people believe they work and others think its just that old snake oil. The truth is,

Your Dreams Don’t Work Unless You Do!

There is a science to the process, its not just some magic wishing board. Or a collage of cool pictures and words. It’s a vision board. Your vision is the most important element. Where do you see yourself? What do you want to have, and who do you want to share it with? I think sometimes folks are just attracted to the picture and have no idea or intention of manifesting any of it. But if you want to take your vision from board to real life, keep reading!

1. Keep It Real- This is easier said than done. It’s so important to be realistic about the vision with out limiting the outcome. Know your limits and gear your expectations accordingly.  I do believe you should create the biggest grandest vision of your dreams. But be real with yourself. If you know you are not a morning person, maybe start with getting up a half hour earlier as a goal instead of going to the gym at 5:30 am as a goal.

2. Be Intentional- I like to say “set your intention”. Focus your thoughts in the direction of your vision. Show up ready to work and set your intentions on reaching your goal. I use to have such a problem with this step. In prayer, I would thank God for certain things, then find myself complaining about having to perform or maintain those same things.

Remember thoughts become things.

3. Take Action-  It is of the utmost importance that your words and actions line up with your vision. If travel is on your vision board, start by getting your passport. Or book a hotel somewhere close enough to drive to and explore the sites. Bookmark that Kayak/explore page so you can keep an eye out for places you can afford to go to. As you can see more travel is on my board!

4. Stay Positive- This should go without saying, but it’s impossible to have a positive out come if all you give out is negativity. As I said above, thoughts become things. So keep your thoughts, words, and environment positive.

5. Trust Yourself To Make The Right Decision- Some people go through life not making any decisions, for fear of being responsible for the making the wrong decisions. Need I say this leads to stagnation and dissatisfaction. Just know, you will make some mistakes, but just learn from them and keep pushing. Some say if you are going through life not making any mistakes, you are not taking enough chances. You know what Brother Donnie McClerkin says! We Fall Down, But We Get Up! Just keep getting up and giving it your all.

6. Know That You Know What You Know- It may not be easy to say, but it is very simple to do. Just don’t water the weeds! The weeds are your distractions, doubts, and fears.  Just know that what you are doing is to manifest your vision and see your goals to reality. Starve your distraction. Feed your goals. In other words, you will never please everyone, so you might as well please yourself.

7. Collaborate & Connect- They say if you want to go fast go alone. If you want to go far, go together. Networking across with like minded individuals will make for great motivation. The environment will be rich with ideas and creativity. Not to mention having a sound companion or group to get and give valuable information.

8. Be The Light- There will be haters, and negative Nelly’s. Just shine anyway. You never know who you will encourage.

9. Give Yourself Permission To Be Blessed- All to often we let negative voices crowd our space. We start to believe that good things never happen to people like you and I. And if someone does offer us a seemingly ” to good to be true ” opportunity, we believe just that. This must be to good to be true. So we sabotage our chances at success because we don’t believe we deserve said opportunity anyway. Just know that you do!

So Happy 2018!  Give yourself a pat on the back. Whatever 2017 gave you, you have overcome it! You made it through the ups and downs. The set backs and set ups, and come out on the other side with the knowledge and wisdom gained from all those experiences.  Now you have to move forward with the goals and plans designed for your success!


Slightly Guilt Free, Guilty Chocolate Chip Cookies: A Spin On The Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookies!

Okay, let’s be honest, we only post our best selves on social media, but that is not truly all that what makes me who I am. So, that’s my intro before I admit that I fell off again with my fitness and health, but this time I truly felt no guilt. It got bad, I mean real bad. In my quest to satisfy this defying sweet tooth, I found the perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe! They were gooey, chocolate-ly, and super soft. Have you noticed how much I loved these cookies, yet?

One day I woke up and said, okay, enough is enough. I went out and purchased all of this healthy food and started back exercising, but I still had everything to make my good ole chocolate chip cookies. Now, if you’ve been following me you know that I don’t believe in depriving myself the foods that I enjoy, but I do believe in cutting back and hitting those calories with a hard punch of exercise. This isn’t the best method, but it works for me.

A week into being fit phatty again, the kids say “Mommy, we love your chocolate cookies, can you please make some?” How can I deny those cute faces? How can I also make those perfect cookies and not indulge. (Ok, I know it’s possible to make the cookies and not eat them, but I want some gooey cookies too!) I decided we will eat cookies tomorrow on cheat day.  If I am going to cheat myself and divert from my diet, I was going to do it with a little less guilt. How, you ask? With ground flax seed! Now, I won’t lie, I was very nervous that I was going to ruin the cookies, but I did it anyway. And you know what? No one noticed! 

Realistically, this does not make the cookie healthy, but it makes me feel less guilty! I do not recommend them as a healthy alternative, but it’s a nice cheat day snack. These cookies are small and delicious, and are about 120 calories per tablespoon. Which means you can burn off four of those cookies with about 25 minutes of using the kettlebell 🙂

This recipe is so simple, I asked myself why did I waste money buying processed cookie dough, when I could just make it from scratch!. It’s about 10 minutes for prep time, 9-12 minutes to cook, and 10 minutes to cool. I cook my cookies for only 9 minutes because I like them really soft, but if you prefer a crispier cookie, cook your cookies for 11 to 12 minutes.


2 cups of all purpose flour

1 cup of dark brown sugar (packed)

1 cup of white sugar

1/2 tsp of baking soda

1/2 tsp of salt

3/4 cup of melted butter

1 tbs of vanilla extract

1 tbs of ground flaxseed

1 egg

1 egg yolk

2 cups of semi sweet chocolate chip cookies



  1. Preheat your oven to 325 degrees
  2. In a small bowl, sift together your flour, baking soda, and salt. Place mixture to the side
  3. In a medium bowl, cream together the melted butter, brown sugar, and white sugar. Stir vigorously until it is well blended.
  4. Beat in the egg, egg yolk, and vanilla extract.
  5. Add the sifted ingredients and ground flaxseed, mixing it well with the wet ingredients.
  6. Add the chocolate chips
  7. Grease your cookie sheet and place 1 tbs of cookie dough on the cookie sheet, leaving about 1 to 2 inches of room to allow the cookies room to spread.
  8. Cook cookies for 9 to 10 minutes (cook an additional 2 to 3 minutes if you want crispier cookies)
  9. Allow cookies to cool.
  10. ENJOY

This recipe makes about 3 dozen cookies. You can always store the cookie dough in the refrigerator for just a couple of days, if you’re not going to use it soon, go ahead and freeze it!

As stated before this is not a healthy alternative, but it comes with a little less guilt! Flaxseed has many benefits and I’m going to add it to a few more things! Shhhhhh, don’t tell my family!

If you try this recipe, let us know!! And if you think your recipe is healthier or better, let us know!

Until next time, catch you later!

  • The Fit Phatty


Picture Me Through The Blush Of Rose Gold

In just a few short hours I’ll be 44 years old. Somehow through God’s grace, I am an independent, confident, productive, wife, mother and grandmother. Yes, this still trips me out, because I know for sure most of it was not intentional on my part. I wish I had the foresight to have planned my life. I give those of you with those 5 and 10 year plans mad props. It took me a long time to have faith in my decision making ability, so I would have never trusted that I knew what I wanted. Even as a little girl, I spent a lot of time alone because I was always on punishment for one thing or another. Being chastised for everything made me fearful of making choices on my own. I actually use to tell myself that I wasn’t capable of making good choices. Not an easy road to be on.

This belief lead to me, just letting life happen to me instead of planning my steps. I was mostly reactive to what ever situations or choices others chose for me. Sometimes I had a good reaction, sometimes it was down right disastrous. I’m a very emotional being by nature, so a lot of my reaction were pure emotion. And if you know like I know, this was not going to turn out well. I had my first son as a teenager, and my second son in my early twenties. I had a decent job, but it just wasn’t going to take care of three of us. By the time I had my second son, I knew I had to make  changes in my life. It started with my deciding that I was know longer going to be held back by the negative Nellys in my head. I started writing down goals and figuring out how to work towards them. A few years ago I ran across an old journal, I had to laugh when I read the goals. All I wanted was to have a car, a job, and my own place. The funny thing is, those goals seem so low, but I don’t remember being excited or even acknowledging when I reached them. Somehow, I made myself believe those goals were nothing. To some they may not be, but for me obviously it was something I needed to focus on attaining. So at that very moment, I allowed myself to be proud. Even though it was 20 years later! I let go of thinking my accomplishments are nothing. I deserve to celebrate me.

I may have said this before, but by growing up without my mom in my life, I was determined to be the mom I didn’t have. Thank God He blessed me with the ability to be a good provider for my boys. I use to wonder if I was doing a good job, then one day I looked up and not only was I taking care of my 2, but I was also taking care of my little sister and brother, and many of my younger cousins from time to time.

In the role as caregiver, I began to put myself last again . Always thinking if I didn’t do it, it wouldn’t get done. After many years of sacrificing myself for the greater good of the rest of the people around me, kind of made me sad. As I look back at my thirties, I realize I spent the entire decade depressed. Mainly because I wasn’t doing anything to feed my soul. Everything was for someone else. Part of my believed that I had to keep holding all the weight or everything would fall apart and I would be the blame. I can remember my husband telling me, that everyone else can afford to be happy because I’m holding all their misery. Lol, thank God for him. He was so right. I let go of being responsible for everyone but me. I deserve to be first. It’s ok to be a little selfish sometimes.

When I turned Forty I promised myself that I was going to take better care of me. I know it might seem a little late in the game, but you know what they say: better late than never. Today I am a mother of three, a wife, and a grandmother. It’s not easy to let old habits go, but everyday I seek God for guidance and direction. As I keep moving forward on this road to self love and acceptance, there are highs and lows. But just like that old saying says, I’m looking at life through ” rose-tinted glasses”. I chose to see the good in my life. I love the institution of love and believe love is the answer. Today I believe I am not only capable of making good decisions, but I’m equipped to teach others how to as well. Today I believe that I am the master of my own destiny. Today I believe that I am worthy to be celebrated. Today I believe that I am too important not to be a priority. Today I am seeking my golden life. As I approach my forty fourth year I believe all things are possible and are working together for my good!

Outfit dets: Satin Bomber ( Charlotte Russe) Blush Denim ( Lane Bryant)

Saying Farewell To Summer : My Summer Of Yes To Self

There is something about the hot days and bright colors of Summer that lends itself to endless promises of fun filled days and exhausting excitement! I know, I always think of vacations, easy living, quick meals, cold treats and tons of barbecues, brunches, and outdoor events that are just beaming with happy beautiful people, just enjoying life and living in pure joy! But is that really true? It can be if you say Yes to self!

This Summer I knew I wouldn’t be able to go on an epic vacation, so I made a conscious decision to enjoy my Summer Saturdays to the fullest. Instead of lamenting about what I couldn’t do, I chose to enjoy what I could. Believe me you, it wasn’t easy to watch my friends and family traveling to and from Aruba, Greece, Sol, even China and Dubai! I made the decision to live through them instead of being ungrateful for what I have. Yes, I embarked on epic vacation like experience for myself on my Summer Saturdays!

I spent most of my Summer 17 Saturdays hitting up free music festivals, going sight seeing, and flea market treasure hunting. I treated myself to a Mary J Blige concert. Yes, two days before the show, I looked up the tickets and saw that they still had seats for the MSG show. I texted my girls and they were more than excited to go. Normally I would have talked  myself out of going. Just because it wasn’t planned in advanced, but I’m so glad that I said yes to myself!   We had a ball, all three of us work hard and take great care of our families, but we rarely do something just for ourselves. Yes, Treat Yo Self!

I knew I had already purchased my ticket to TheCurvycon being held during New York Fashion Week, so I knew I had that to look forward to as well. Yes, being in the company of so many confident, beautiful, positive, curvy women and men is intoxicating! Yes, Find Yo Tribe!

I was invited to the New Jersey Hair N Beauty Expo as a special invited guest. The initial yes was to the invite. I was excited to be in the collective of all the New Jersey naturals from my area. Then wouldn’t you know it, I was asked to be on the panel, to answer questions about my natural hair journey, and to encourage and instruct new naturalists! Yes, I said Yes! Yes, To Yo Testimony!

So the calendar says it’s the start of fall, but the temperatures have been hotter this past week, than many of the days in our so called summer. We Say Goodbye to the season, but we don’t have to say the promise. Carry the feeling of seeking joy into to Fall by saying Yes To Self!

How did you spend your Summer? Did you do things that make you happy? Did you say Yes To Self? Let me know in the comments how your plan to say yes to yourself.

How Exercise Can Help You Get Out Of You Grey Zone: Combat Depression

We are often only taught about major depression.  That identifiable grey cloud that follows you everywhere you go. You know the heavy feeling in your arms and legs. Or the dark not wanting to get out of bed or can’t face the world type. But there are several other types of depression some of them are more mild but they still have an affect on your life.

Mayo Clinic defines depression as: A mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest.


About 2 percent of the American population has a form of depression that’s less severe than major depression, but is still very real. It’s called dysthymia.


Dysthymia is a type of depression that causes a low mood over a long period of time. It may last for a year or more. Most sufferers perform normally but just not optimally. Symptoms include sadness, trouble concentrating, fatigue, and changes in sleep habits and appetite.


This type of depression nearly  ruined my relationship. I went through a spell of depression for about  a year. But here’s the kicker – I had no idea I was depressed. The truth is, it just seeps in and becomes a part of you, before  you even know it. I didn’t feel sad or blue all the time, I was not crying uncontrollably, I didn’t miss milestones, nor fight myself to get out of bed. So how could I know that I was depressed? It wasn’t until I was on the other side of it that I realized what I had been delivered from. I started to realize that I hadn’t been myself.

While I was going through it, of course I could not see the effect that depression had on my relationship. Neither of us had any idea that I was suffering from depression, yet I was not myself and in return we were not who we once were.


Depression has left some residual effects, with many pieces to clean up, but one thing that has helped me is exercising. I began exercising for weight loss and eventually I realized without losing a significant amount of weight, that I was feeling much  better. Cardio always left me more energized and happier, but strength training is just a necessary evil (lol).


Although exercise was my catalyst to launch me out of the grey zone. Here are some other tips and ticks that can help to feed your soul:


  1. Unplug– Sometimes you just have to take a some time and let yourself destress from everyone. As a mom this isn’t always easy but you have to put yourself first so you can come back whole for everyone instead of giving them your half ass self.
  2. Day Dream– Allow yourself to remember the things you love and why. Imagine the possibilities of abundance God has for you. Create the biggest grandest vision of your life, and believe it’s available to you.
  3. Forget Perfect- This alone is freeing. Done is so much better than perfect, as long as you do the best you can do, allow yourself to be proud of your accomplishments. Remind yourself of your own natural  flawlessness and check out our post Born Flawless: Embrace Your Normal!
  4. Call A Friend- You can’t underestimate the effect a sound voice will have on your soul. Call a good friend that you can have a laugh with.
  5. Focus On A Hobby- Just the pleasure of doing something you love. Or learning something new will feed your body good vibes.
  6. Meditate- Sometimes I just do a quick 5 minute guided meditation. I pull one up on YouTube and lay down and breath.
  7. Get Moving- Even if you don’t have a gym membership, or have an hour to dedicate to a workout routine. Give yourself ten minutes and just dance or check out our post on 5 Yoga Poses To Get Your Day Going Right!


I’d stopped exercising for nearly a year and I noticed that I didn’t always feel as good, as I used too. But now that I am back at it, I realized the most important benefit of my exercise routine is my mental strength.

Let's jump into hump day right! 🙌🏾 Mid week motivation. My body has been doing some weird stuff these past three weeks, not too sure what's happen but I must adapt. The main thing that has thrown me off is the fact I'm barely eating. I decided regardless I have to. Taking care of my body is sooooo important, nothing to be taken lightly. Especially during this season where I am looking to lose weight and build strength. I'm doing my best to figure it out one day at a time! Some days are better than others but what matters is that I continually make an effort each and everyday! 😏 Don't let changes stop you from achieving your goals! When something changes, adapt and keep moving! 🏃🏾‍♀️Even better when you have a partner to motivate you! Tag teaming with my girl @evanssam89 #fitnessbuddies #lifewitjoy #healthyliving #afrogirlfitness

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One additional benefit of the added energy is a renewed optimism to rebuild my life. So sometimes, depression isn’t ugly, it’s just not pretty. Don’t get stuck in the grey zone.


We’d love to hear some of your tips to helps stay out of the grey zone!


As always Love from The Fit Phatty


Wisdom Wednesday : Are You Missing Your Blessing?

“And God said, “Let the earth sprout vegetation, plants yielding seed, and fruit trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind, on the earth.” And it was so. The earth brought forth vegetation, plants yielding seed according to their own kinds, and trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, the third day.”
‭‭Genesis‬ ‭1:11-13‬ ‭ESV‬‬


I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sped through the creation story, never recognizing the blessing in divine order. God created fruit beating trees, vegetation, and plants yielding seed .i.e “food” days before there was anything living to eat the food. Three days before creating man,on the 6th day, and two days before creating the animals on the fifth day.

On the third day God provided provision. Before there was even a need. He had not yet created Adam and Eve yet he made provisions for them.

This is exactly the way God makes provision for us! Well in advance of our need, God has already provided the “food”. But how often are we speeding by the creation because it seems insignificant?

Or maybe we have a picture of what said blessing should look like, so we can’t acknowledge the blessing when it shows up, because it’s not packaged the way we think it should be.

Well, we know what happened to the last “people” that rejected a blessing because it didn’t appear they way they thought it should right? Ok then, enough said.

The challenge for us is to see the provision and care, even when it is different than we expect, because God is God, his ways are not like our ways, and His thought are higher than our thoughts.

First we must have faith. When we put your faith in Christ, God commissions himself to protect, provide, and care for us.

When you put your faith in Christ, the bible tells us we will have what ever we so desire. God always provides for his children, though often it is not in the way we expect or hope.

So as I bring this message to a close I leave you with the following scripture

Matthew‬ ‭7:7-8‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

And lastly, always seek God!

Born Flawless : Embrace Your Normal

“You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.”
‭‭Song of Songs‬ ‭4:7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

First and foremost God loves you and

“You were born flawless”

Auntie Oprah likes to say babies come into the world trailing the breath of Angels. They know they are born flawless.

As we grow through life and experiences we get imprinted with images, encounters and other people’s  beliefs and  ideas which cause us to question our flawless-ness. These people who imprint their beliefs, and fears on our psyche, sometimes think they are doing us a favor.

I’m not just talking about tramatic or drastic things. Sometimes these are subtle consistant themes or words that we hear or are being told that slowly seep into our being. And before you know it, you and self doubt are old roommates!

Self doubt can hold you hostage. Usually there are two extremes. Either you exhaust your self trying to over compensate for your feelings of inadequacy. Or you become paralyzed with fear of failure and never step out on faith.

You end up standing by, questioning every thought and watching everyone else get what God has for them. Sometimes this can ever make you bitter, or worst yet, you become a hater! You hate on any and everything because you can’t find your joy. But all you have to do is realize that it’s you that holds your own self back!

How to have a totally awesome life 👉 ( old post same thoughts)

You need only to make a decision to seek your own happiness!

“Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing.” ~Unknown

Here are three steps to embracing your normal:

#1 The first step is to stop comparing yourself to others! Their normal is not your normal. Even identical twins are not completely the same. There is no other human being that has your specific gifts and talents. What God gave you is uniquely created to bring forth your purpose.

#2 Stop questioning yourself!  You are more than enough. Don’t let that imposter syndrome make you believe that,  what you have is not for you. Consider God’s grace. When you feel undeserving, that’s a reminder to be grateful! God’s Grace has shined upon you. Give God The Glory!

#3 Forget trying to be perfect! I’m not saying don’t do your best, but your best is as perfect as it gets. If you start taking the steps towards your dreams, have faith that God will magnify them. I remember as a young parent, I would have a certain vision in mind that I want to create for my children.  I’d  get as much as I could, but not the way I had envisioned. So in my mind,  I would immediately start thinking of apologies for not being good enough. And before I could open my mouth to apologize, they were thanking me and showing me how grateful they were.

So remember short, tall or bald, you are flawless! Big belly, flat booty,skinny legs, big legs, you are still flawless! Walk in your beauty and embrace your normal!


Love others as you love yourself, but you must first love yourself!


Let’s Celebrate Mrsphatandnaptural Turns 3!

Mrsphatandnaptural Turns 3 years old today! Whoo hoo! I may not be where some have risen to in 3 years, but I’m still here! Over these 3 short years I have found many new friends both online and in person. I’ve attended, held, and hosted many events. I’ve even traveled to 2 states that I had never been to for just to attend Plus Sized Fashion and or Natural Hair events. I’ve have also been featured on a few online sites, namely

Still I’d have to say the biggest “get” from the last 3 years of blogging has to be tapping into a supportive sisterhood that I didn’t even realize existed. They are an encouraging, loving, creative bastion of knowledge and experiences that I can’t seem to go a day without…( okay so I’m a social media junkie) lol. That aside I love being apart of this collective!


As I move forward with Mrsphatandnaptural some things will change. In the spirit of serving those who need what I’m cooking up, I will commit to staying honest, current, and open to God using me. I will continue to give you all the tips tricks and styles of the latest conversation. I will do the product reviews and include you into my battle with this belly! But I will also share with you my love for God and all things good for your soul!
Remember to celebrate yourself! And just know God doesn’t make any mistakes, and that includes you!